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Best friend dating ex wife, be prepared for consequences you might not like

It started our innocently enough. If you've decided after careful deliberation that it is okay to date the ex of an acquaintance, move forward with care. Probably the cleanest and least complex scenario is that you date someone where there is no crossover of social circles.

Or is this someone you never met before and you have no experience of being with them together as a couple? She ran into him at a political event years later when they were both divorced. Be sure to be appreciative for his time and willingness to hear you out. Hypothetically these couplings could work out very well if you proceed with extreme caution and follow some guidelines. That being the case, there is a high probability that you may be asked out by someone who was once married to a friend, acquaintance, colleague, or even a relative.

And some of those folks may have previously been wed to a person you are familiar or even friendly with. Everyone said they'd be terribly upset if it was a good friend. How long have you been friends and how close are you? They started dating shortly thereafter.

Now that we've established that it is not okay to date the ex of a best or even good friend, let's discuss acquaintances. In my opinion, bordeaux dating the exes of best friends or really good friends are completely off limits. Angie had been married to a long-ago friend of Brian's.

Be prepared for consequences you might not like

In the case of Brian and Angie, Brian did call his old friend to communicate his intentions. However, how you ask will make all the difference. But in today's E-world, there is a good chance that you may run into someone that you'd like to date and you happen to know their ex. He had a good feeling about this, and as luck would have it, his instincts were on target. The same thing can happen even if you live in a large city.

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Essentially, how much tension still exists between them, if any? None of this sounds awful or insurmountable, right?

Use your moral compass to guide you. How long has it been since their relationship ended? While this might make for some awkward conversation in the beginning, it doesn't have to be a deal-breaker. Among the matches eHarmony's algorithms presented him with, he discovered Angie, a beautiful and intelligent woman who shared many of his passions. At least now you'll be prepared.

Essentially, how much do you value this friendship and want to maintain it? Brian had been divorced for three years when he filled out the cumbersome eHarmony profile.

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So what happens if the person you are interested in dating, or are falling in love with, was formerly married to a friend? As well as, obviously, addressing the situation directly with the person you want to be dating. There is a good chance that when you start dating, no matter where you live, you will come across some potential candidates that you are already acquainted with. Consider taking the high road by addressing the situation directly with the acquaintance prior to getting involved with their ex. Start with your intention.

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In their particular circumstances, Angie had been divorced for five years and Brian had not spoken to his old friend in over a decade.

How do you negotiate these potentially rocky waters? In a small town, there is a strong possibility that you know many of the divorced singles living there already.

Consider the factors

If you need to flag this entry as abusive, send us an email. Tell your friend that your friendship is important to you and you want to maintain it. Apparently Angie's divorce was not an amicable one, and her ex was infuriated with both of them. If nothing else, how the two of you met and your relationship story could make for a great wedding toast. Such a situation, of course, can be tricky, and must be handled with care.

Why cause pain to someone you care about and who cares about you in return? After some initial hesitation for the same reason, Angie agreed to go out with him, and their first date led to a delightful courtship that culminated in marriage. Good friendships are sacrosanct. Although the couple couldn't be happier today, they pissed off a few folks along the way.

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Or, on the other hand, you might be the one doing the asking out. Nevertheless, Brian thought about it and decided to contact Angie anyway.

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What was the ending of their relationship like? People you know might pleasantly surprise you by asking you out.

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How well and for how long have you known his ex? Consider the factors Two men talking on a walk iStock.

Most importantly, what are your intentions? The men had been colleagues once, but that was many years back.

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